How To ... Get Closer To Your Crush

Admit it. There's a boy you've pining over for weeks (or months or years). You've loved him from afar. Watched him laugh with his friends, pick the olives off his pizza, and--to your utter horror and heartbreak--indulge in some serious PDA with his queen of the Barbie clones girlfriend.

But the world just shifted. The inseparable couple is now officially, unequivocally, irreversibly over. The chance you've been waiting for has finally arrived. Now you just have to figure out how to capitalize on the opportunity.

Here are five ways you might get closer to your crush:

1. Join A Team. Is your crush a hardcore jock? Then what better way to show up on his radar than to show up for practice? Run track or swim on a summer team, where boys and girls practice together. Join the basketball team or take up tennis--even if the boys and girls teams practice separately, they often share buses for out-of-town games, sit together at assemblies, and scrimmage against each other for extra practice.

2. Make Some Music. Maybe your crush is the musical type. If he marches with the school band, only a few clarinet lessons keep you from marching at his side. If he's more the garage band type, find out when his next gig is and plant yourself in the crowd--be sure to compliment his performance afterwards.

3. Join A Club. Is your crush more the straight As and extra-curriculars type? The next time his Science Club has a meeting, be there--lab coat not required. (Plus, it will look good on your college applications!)

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4. Be A Loyal Customer. Does your crush have a day job? Maybe he delivers pizza on the weekends or works the rental counter at the local video store. Well, a girl has to eat and be entertained, right? Just make sure you don't get in the way of him actually doing his job--he'd probably like to keep it.

5. Ask For Help. If there's one thing all guys like--all people, actually--it's praise for something they're good at. So, if your crush has a particular talent that you don't, why not ask him for help. See if he's available for English tutoring. Or can teach you how to draw those cool graffiti letters he's always sketching--be sure to have a reason, like you want to make really cool posters for your class treasurer campaign.

What do all of the above have in common? They are all ways to show that you and your crush have mutual interests. That's a signal that, once he's finally taken notice, you'll actually have things to talk about beyond how much you've been crushing on him.

There's one last important thing to keep in mind while on your crush quest: You are not a stalker. Approaching any of the above activities with the intention of just getting a chance to gaze longingly at your crush from a closer distance is going to get your nowhere. You have to take the opportunity and make something of it. Keep this valuable axiom in mind:

We almost never regret the things we do, but we often regret the things we didn't do.

In other words, if you take that first step to go after your crush, the worst that can happen is he says, "No." But if you don't, you will never know what might have been.

Time to put this lesson into action. Which one of these ways can you use to get closer to your crush?

Hugs,
TLC
OH. MY. GODS. -- Dutton, May 2008
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