Monday, April 26, 2010

Newton’s Law: Lies Return To Haunt You

We are celebrating Stephanie Hale’s newest release, The Alpha Bet this week, with a daily giveaway of a signed copy the book. So be sure to comment each day to be entered to win!


Relating to the theme of The Alpha Bet, we’re going to be talking about lies we have told. And I must start with the line I’ve tried to live by all these years: if you’re going to lie, make sure you do it well. In other words, do not do what I did...

Okay...back in my single days, I found myself in a nightclub in Copenhagen. My friends had disappeared, and I was sort of killing time waiting for them, when this guy about my age approached me. We started talking about both being Americans on vacation in Europe...and then he asked me where I worked.

I told him the name of the university, and that I worked in the physics department. Where I was, incidentally, the office manager. I expected the usual so-what-do-you-do-there, and he really shocked me by instead asking what I had written my Ph.D thesis on.

And suddenly, I had this scathingly brilliant idea. I mean, here I was in Europe, talking to some guy I would never see again. What the heck? So I took a breath and relayed the title of a research paper that one of our professors had just had published.

Funny, huh? I thought so. Until he responded with a physics-lingo-appropriate question.

It turned out he was a physicist. And he was familiar with my “research topic,” my department, and my “co-workers,” (actually, my bosses). WHAT WERE THE ODDS OF THIS?

Happy, he started talking shop. Relativistic this-and-that, thermo-whatsis, hydro-whatever. While adrenaline raced through me. How could I get out of there? Where are my friends? And worst of all...if he showed up at my office, could I get fired for “impersonating a physicist?”

When it was my turn to speak, I impulsively blurted out: “I can’t...have this conversation. You don’t understand.” Then I really started lying. Because what better way to get out of a lie? “My--my husband and I divorced because we couldn’t talk about anything but physics. And I swore I’d never date another one. Or if I did, we wouldn’t talk about work.” (To be very clear, no such ex-husband existed.)

Stupid? Totally! Because of course, now to top things off, the guy thinks I’m interested in him romantically!

I made it through another hour or so, then my friends returned and we hit the door. He followed me, saying the next time he was at my university, he would look me up. Would this ever end?

So when I got back to my office a couple weeks later, I had no choice but to tell the front office staff what happened, so if he showed up, to say I no longer worked there. The story, of course, went like wildfire around the department. Tina pretending to be a physicist--to a physicist. And the person who loved it the most? A good-looking post-doctoral student named Ferraro, who took me to dinner to hear more...

Okay, so this tale of my red-faced deception has a happy ending. I am, after all, a romance writer (and not a physicist). Ferraro and I started having regular dinners together, and went on, of course, to marry. And that guy never showed up in my office. He probably looked back on the evening and either thought me emotionally unstable or completely full of it. (Both of which are arguably true.) But it really taught me a lesson about lying: don’t do even if you THINK you can do it well!

To be entered in this contest, feel free to tell me what you think of this and what would might have done. Or maybe a lie you told. Your choice! Just be sure to enter because you're going to love Steph's new book!

All of the winners’ names will be posted on Sunday!

Tina

Tina Ferraro
The ABC’s of Kissing Boys, 2010 Rita® Finalist
How to Hook a Hottie, 2009 Rita® Finalist
Top Ten Uses for an Unworn Prom Dress
www.tinaferraro.com

19 comments:

Janie Emaus said...

That is the best story I've heard in a long time. I'd call it the Happily Ever Lie!

TinaFerraro said...

Thanks for that title, Janie! Wow, if I'd thought of it, I would have used it! =)

stephhale said...

Best. Story. Ever. ;) I bet your hubby never lets you live that one down.

Wendy Toliver said...

What a great story, Tina!

yabooknerd said...

awesome story - funny and sweet.

Heather Davis said...

OMG. That is the best lie story ever. Thanks, Tina, for cracking me up!

Dani. said...

Ha thats so funny Tina! In your shoes I probably would have done the same thing except make something up about not being able to talk about it, because I've "said too much already." :)

TinaFerraro said...

Haha, I am glad all of you are enjoying this one. And Dani, great answer...wish I'd thought of it!

YA Vampire Books said...

Hahaha LOVE this story and the lies you told that poor man :P
And, it looks like something good came out of it, since you met your husband! People should stop saying that no good things comes out of lying! ;)

karincameron said...

First...I've never "nightclubed" before, watching it on TV is enough to get me worried. Secondly, the diagram, reminded me that not only do I hate math, but I have homework to do. Thirdly, I'm emotionally unstable, but my hubby still loves me, however, because of my emotionally unstable"ness" I simply can't lie!

Mrs. V said...

Sounds like your lie has all the makings of a great chick lit book:) It reminds me just a little of Sophie Kinsella's Can You Keep a Secret? I loved that book.

Llehn said...

AWESOMENESS!! I love that story!! Thanks for sharing.

Cara King said...

LOL, Tina!

I can't think of any entertaining stories about me lying, unfortunately. Well, I could make one up, but that would be, you know, lying...

nymfaux said...

I have no lies that come anywhere near that. Your awesomeness leaves me speechless.

GirlforChrist said...

I love that story!

Serenissima said...

OMG, what a funny story! So glad it had a happily ever after!

Bee said...

ZOMG that is effing hilarious! In retrospect, it must have been nervewracking, Tina..
I guess I'd have done the same thing but I doubt I'd have been able to carry off even relating a physics thesis 'cos personally I hate physics and physics hates me :P

Steph said...

That is very funny, but luckily you had a happy ending, so you really benefited from that situation. Lol!! I probably would've just told the guy what I really did at the university, instead. Then I would explain that I was only lying to him because it was a dare?? (I would possibly say that.) Maybe he would've found it clever and charming. Who knows? Then again, if you did that, you wouldn't have gotten the husband you have today. Well, maybe you would, but it probably wouldn't have been that easy. Lol.

stephhale said...

Congrats to Monday's winner, YAVampire Books! Plz send your info to stephanie@stephaniehale.com